I have to say that I don't as much as my mom did. Maybe as generation go by, we'll work our way down to minimal yelling! I'm a minimal yeller. Meaning, I don't do it that often.
Yelling in a fit of rage is not good for anyone. Especially for a baby to hear! How do you, or I overcome the urge to yell?
Here are 10 tips that have helped with our family (not that we're perfect):
- When you want your older kids to get something done, whisper. Whispering is sacred to kids, they love a secret, so they are more apt to do what you want them to do.
- Play music when it's time to get household tasks accomplished. Kid's get really into listening to music. When it's playing, it lifts the spirit a little more. It makes the dreaded task much more fun. Try and see how much a kid can do before a song finishes up.
- Set the timer. This works for kids older then age 5. They may not know how to tell time yet; they do know when something starts it has to finish. If you show them a timer, and explain how it works they will be more motivated to get the job done in a timely fashion.
- Clean with your kids. Sometimes tasks are HUGE in a child's eyes. They need a little help.
- Break up. Have one parent do one task, while the other does something else with the kids. Then you feel like you get something done.
- Take a timeout yourself. Sometimes even parents need one!
- Praise your kids for doing things right. Then they won't feed off of negative behavior.
- I know some people are very anti counting, but if it works for you do it! We do.
- Give one instruction at a time. My oldest really needs this break down! He is single task minded.
- If you feel like yelling, you still can. It's not that you yell, it's that you are directing your anger out on your children. Have a yelling match just for fun. The kids will think this is fun. They won't think you are yelling at them. **Don't do this one around a baby. They won't enjoy it. Go outside and yell!
Too much yelling can be counter productive. Over yelling can be just as harmful as physical abuse. “Children can become immune to being yelled at and start to tune it out,” according to psychologist Myrna B. Shure, Ph.D., of Drexel University.
Alissa teaches at The Creative Center in Omaha Nebraska. It is an art college. She loves being a mom, decorating sugar cookies, discussing the topic of breastfeeding and blogging.